Anger might be one of the most primal human behaviors. It can flare up like a flame and cause a lot of damage. It seems to take shape sometimes before the brain even realizes that this deep, seething wave of energy is steamrolling through the body.
But as you mature, maybe you just have more experience in snuffing out the flame of anger. Maybe you recognize it faster and take action. Maybe you're old enough to not want to embarrass yourself by saying or doing things you will later regret.
While anger is not an admirable trait, it is a "normal" reaction, but if left to linger, anger is debilitating and destructive. It can totally compromise your objectives for happiness or success. It can eat you alive.
I was told by a close friend who is a practicing Buddhist to try a different approach to the things in life that are hurtful or cause anger. She told me to embrace the moment and to feel the things the moment causes me to experience. Through that process, the anger begins to dissipate. I'm not sure why it works, but it's almost as if you meet the source of your anger face to face, stare it down and then it slinks away.
Sure, when bad things happen, anger comes and goes, but I have learned to again, feel what I'm supposed to feel as a human being, and then let it go. Be angry, understand why I am angry, peel away the layers of that anger, and then release it.
Another thing that helps me is to go spend time on the beach. So many times when I have been angry or irritated, I have gravitated to an oceanside spot to try to escape the personal misery I have created. Standing there looking at the sea, comprised of wave after wave on a beach comprised of zillions of grains of sand, I realize what a small dot I am in the universe. I realize that God is pretty busy. I realize that my anger is not even worth a grain of sand in this beautiful place. And if I am fortunate enough to stand in such beauty with the gift of a new day, I am a fool to waste my emotions on the ugliness of anger.
Jan. 11, 2012
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